Clarity of Innocence

Sadly, all parties need insight or therapy before this can happen!

Regrettably, we have to unlearn most of what we believe about relationships!

We think wrong!

It’s not our fault!

Our natural awareness, insight, and ability to relate and empathize has been re-directed by the world we were born into.

Our environment has caused us to think and behave in ways that cause fighting, instead of co-operation.

In other words, love and co-operation are impossible with todays thinking, and it’s getting steadily worse in the general population.

In the sciences, we are learning the natural rights of life, and there is hope here.

In the real universe, no life has authority over other lives. Throughout all of natural life, it just doesn’t happen.

Often, we assume we see control of others in nature. What we are seeing though, is voluntary co-operation.

The behavior and the attitudes that create loving relationships await, unused within our identity.

They were meant for our natural default condition of love and fun.

Unfortunately, most of us can’t connect with that identity anymore!

All we have to go by, is what we hear from those around us. Being wrong, what we usually hear doesn’t work.

It takes us right into conflict, and then comes our assumption that there’s something wrong with us.

If we want peace, love, fun, good relationships, and good feelings we need to escape from societies beliefs.

For the moment then, without the guidance of our identity, we will have to go with what works. When we can sense these skills from our own identity, we won’t need that any more.

What is it that works?

Respect works!

We need to allow all others to own and live their own identity!

This includes infants. That’s the bottom line. It’s the short cut to getting along with everybody, all without friction.

This is nature’s way.

Contrary to what we have been led to believe, doing this does not take us into chaos! It never has.

Those warnings of impending chaos that we are so used to hearing are not accurate. They come from people who love to control.

Relaxing and removing control is always good for good people.

People who insist on control either don’t care what the real truth is, or else they are unaware that others, allowed to live through their identity are the best and kindest people anywhere.

It’s the controlling and controlled people who have lost their natural morals.

People connected with their identity naturally co-operate, because they want to! They don’t need control.

We all know people who would never hurt a fly. That comes from identity! These people do not try to control others.

It’s the demands for obedience that are taking us into chaos, not freedom!

More rules and control take us consistently into more conflict throughout society. There are examples all over the world, and within various families.

Once disconnected from their identities, people are different. They can behave with cruelty, and never feel a thing. Doesn’t it seem like we have arrived here now?

Respect encourages our natural co-operation, and then love becomes possible! It’s very easy to test.

Amazingly enough, an infant’s identity is every bit as powerful as ours.

Being fully intact, their inner power is astonishing. We should hope to feel such strength!

Without conflict, love is our natural state.

Our own identities understand perfectly.

Unconnected, they still do what they can in the background. That’s why we feel bad when we control others. Ever notice that?

We believe we are right when we demand obedience, but our identities are screaming to us, don’t do this!

We can easily get along in peace and love if we can listen to our inner selves.

Our identity is where all the answers are. It has instincts, racial wisdom, connection with our body and feelings, and connection with our real needs and wants.

Which makes us wonder, what exactly happened within us. Why can’t we feel our identity? Why can’t we use that wisdom?

Unfortunately, society causes us to hurt until we disconnect from identity. Then we are lost. We don’t know what we want or what is fair. We don’t feel our feelings or sense the feelings of others. With so much of the population unconnected with their real emotional life, assumptions that are just plain wrong, start to appear here and there, and then in the media.

Right along with that process, co-existence with others becomes increasingly difficult or impossible. Media’s messages take us right into conflict.

Messages from our identities, if we can hear them, take us out of conflict.

It starts in the cradle!

Our identity blasts us into this world in an amazing show of ability. We take on learning to walk and talk, and it doesn’t even slow us down. Remember those days?

Resentment and defiance came later, when our efforts to live from our identity were denied to us, by the people around us.

Throughout all of nature, identity powers and leads life right through to the end!

That’s, of course, what should have happened to us.

If we could parent from our Instincts, that’s how we would all do it.

Removed from societies messages, and those from the media, that’s just what happens.

That life is stress free! More than that, believe it or not, it even gives us energy!

Don’t believe it? Try it! Trust turns us on! Ever spent time with an infant or young child? It’s a respectful world full of imagination. We go in tired and we come out happy.

That’s how all of life is supposed to be.

If we did parent with respect and encouragement for the identity that is already in our children, the world would be as it should. People in their natural condition are loving and playful. That would be our world. It’s the natural environment for humans.

So, what happened to us? We don’t see many loving and playful people any more, do we?

We were not allowed to be ourselves! That’s what happened! That’s it!! That’s all of it! The entire story!

That alone is responsible for the violent condition of our world! This world is not natural.

It’s the consequence of refusing to allow others to live from their identity!

It will get worse as we try to fix our problems with ever-increasing control over others. The strain can probably be measured.

Without control, people are at their very best. With every step of additional control, we get more resentment, defiance, and violence!

Without control, we just get trust. Maybe a little conflict at first until the bad guys mellow out, or die off.

Could it really be that simple? Absolutely! It really is! It’s ridiculously easy to test.

We don’t normally consider trying life that way, because every message we get tells us to use force to get the behavior we want.

To do it right, and re-enter peace, we have to defy the messages from society.

We need to listen to our own inner wisdom, or find wisdom, or else copy nature!

Control did all this damage. It banned identities. It forced infants to disconnect from their identities. It took away natural behavior and morals.

Why did we have to disconnect? It’s impossible to follow directions from two different sources.

One of those sources includes punishment, so that source could not be safely ignored.

We therefore divorce our identity, the other source. We do it with great sadness, and then we settle for being obedient!

We don’t go down easily.

That’s all that happened to cause all this pain within us, and throughout the world!

Can you remember how good and right you felt in your first years.

In that condition we were at our very best. Laws and rules were unnecessary. We were cooperative because we loved everybody, and wanted to do everything possible for them.

We should all still be feeling just like that.

Hopefully, there will come a time when our right to be ourselves is recognized as a natural right! That has to start in the cradle!

That freedom will echo through the world’s culture, just like the resentment from not being allowed to be ourselves does now. Then we get our kind world back!

Allowing infants and children to live their own identity does not create spoiled children. A spoiled child has anger. They may not know why they are angry, but they will act it out. Somehow, somewhere they are not getting what they need.

This post is part of the blog, clarity-of-innocence.com

Many of the other posts describe how natural relationships can, and do work.

Even with respect, differences between people are still going to exist.

Not many, as it happens, because connected with identity everybody is pretty much naturally on the same page.

The basic path to re-connect us with our identity are also discussed in other posts. This is a skill that desperately needs more understanding and competent therapists. There is more to learn here, and it’s the worlds most important need.

People should be able to repair their disconnection in reasonable time, instead of waiting multiple generations for everybody to work their way back to emotional health.

Thanks for listening.

Good luck on your own journey,

Norm