Clarity of Innocence

If you don’t want to be controlled, don’t control your infants and children, or anybody else.

That’s the entire message! That alone, is enough to change human life on this planet.

Respect for identity, is the natural way of all life in this world.

It’s the missing quality, capable of bringing back life, the way it should be for humans.

Not only does that remove conflict, but it also allows us to see who that other person really is!

Ignoring that, takes us to some truly evil places. Our world is experimenting with that right now.

This is the pivot point, the key.

Let’s elaborate.

All life is supposed to come from inside.

Each life powers it’s own existence. That’s natures way. It’s the only way that life can remain healthy, and feel good.

That includes our young.

They are their own life, and the spark has to come from within. If we refuse to allow that, really bad things happen. Which brings us to present day life for humans.

If we insist that they abandon their path, and follow our instructions, then what we have really taught is control.

Because that’s what we did.

We have caused those children to consider it perfectly normal to force others into behaving as we choose.

To understand real truth, follow the feelings. The feelings aren’t good for anybody, anywhere, ourselves included, when we insist on obedience.

It’s the birth of concealing ourselves, shame, living defensively, and conflict.

Children do not surrender their own wishes, needs, and identity voluntarily. They go down screaming, or else hurting silently.

It is hard for us to see the hurt of others. That’s because we have each been hurt, hurt so badly, we shut it off. We became “hurt blind”.

But our hearts can still see it.

Most of us can’t still listen to our feelings, but we feel the sadness in our hearts anyway.

Is it possible to cause hurt, and still create a functional civilization?

Not a human one!

Human’s are loving, gentle, and caring. Bring up any child, allowing them to power their own way, and what do you get? Cooperation, beyond our wildest dreams.

People are full of love and cooperation. That’s our real truth and condition.

It’s not fair to blame controlling behavior on any one bully.

It’s the caregivers, who, being all on the same page, cause control to seem normal.

Obedience will never feel normal in our hearts. The resulting confusion causes us to be concerned, but sorting out what’s wrong, takes years.

Once control happens to us, our hearts don’t speak to us clearly. We have to dig through the hurt for our inner truth.

A wrong message from others can be mistaken for truth, if it happens while we are really young, and we are also being directed to ignore our own feelings.

This is the beginning of believing that control of other lives, is normal and acceptable.

There will be a lot of discussion throughout this blog.

It will all center on how control starts, and how perfect life is for humans, until control enters our world.

This is the real “Garden of Eden” message.

People, as a race are loving, kind, cooperative, and fun loving.

Control changes all that. Conflict becomes the new normal.

People accept control as normal, only when they are too young and too hurting to resist.

We all eventually surrender. When we roll over and become obedient, that’s also the moment we expect it from others. This is why respect is so rare now!

Respect and obedience are polar opposites. Asking for obedience is to disrespect every quality that another living thing already has.

Nature did not make allowances for life to be obedient.

To make a human obedient, we have to break something inside of them first.

There is no wiggle room. One mistake, and the damage is for good.

That’s how nature works. One misstep, and death can happen.

Nature cannot be fooled. Truth rules.

Our love affair with control is why we have so many autoimmune diseases now.

When we must be obedient, our own identity and feelings oppose that. Our own inner drive must be overcome before obedience is possible. The damage shows up as body tension, disease, and of course, feelings of unimportance.

The opposite also works. We can go back, and it is probably our only hope for the quality of life we started out with.

As adults, to rid ourselves of others who wish to control us, we first need to stop all of our own attempts at control over other life.

That’s the first step out of the obedience, control syndrome.

Many adults recognize they are tense, and behaving in ways they don’t want to. They can’t seem to be able to stop, and they can’t get along with anybody else in the loving way, that they know is possible.

Trying doesn’t work. In all of nature, wanting something bad enough, doesn’t help in the least. If we can’t work out the system we are stuck in, we stay as we are.

Well, this is the system. When we treat every other life as independent, with the fire and energy coming from inside them, and respect them in that way, we get cooperation, love, and community.

When we stubbornly insist on our own way, and expect obedience, everybody clams up, and what we get is resentment and hostility.

This message is easy to believe, because it makes natural sense, and because all around us, we see people on each path and we recognize what causes what.

But we can’t make sense of it, and there is a reason. We are “hurt blind”, and this term will keep turning up.

The point of all that explaining is to make it possible to understand the system that is right in our face, but unseen anyway.

So, once again, the first step out of the control trap, is to respect other life. We release all expectations. All other life is self driven, and we back off and respect that. We accept the decisions of others.

What happens next is nothing short of astonishing. Others give us far more than we ever would have got through demanding it.

But, the best is the relationships. Prepare to be delighted.

It’s quite often like this isn’t it. When we have a problem, the method that works is to look at ourselves, and change what should be changed. That’s a reboot. It quite often sets up conditions where the problem doesn’t exist.

We start with ourselves. That begins changes in our corner of the world.

Sounds like wisdom, doesn’t it.

Allowing others their own strength removes conflict within us. It removes conflict within our families.

When enough of us stop controlling those around us, direct force ceases to feel normal.

When we look at a really good relationship, that is what is really happening.

As control of the young gradually tightens, as it has, it feels normalized. It spreads throughout the population. I don’t believe it was always like this.

All that has to be done is to back off on control. For our own happiness, our children should be addressed first. That’s ground zero. It may spread world-wide, but this where the seed lives.

Our world quickly returns to natural, and free life.

That alone removes most of our anxiety.

That’s why some nations cannot find peace. They teach extreme control early in every child’s life. Strong control becomes normalized.

The kids grow up, and control is the new way of civilization.

Conflict follows. Control is disrespect for the inner drive of other life. Once we have opened that door, we get frightened people. They live defensively. Now comes intolerance and hate. Atrocities have become possible.

People get confused because taking over another’s life doesn’t feel right. Our feelings still hurt, and it is hard to listen to our real instincts, and our hearts.

Citizens demand freedom. Usually they remain unaware that first they have to grant freedom to those that they control. Then life begins it’s way back to normal.

Perhaps, that’s real karma!

When other life, especially the young gets respect, public opinion changes. That’s all it takes. That, and a little time.

It’s averaged out public opinion that drives everything!

It is early damage and brainwashing that allows us to ignore our hearts and instincts, and believe whatever we are told.

Don’t make the mistake of believing that allowing the young their freedom causes chaos. It’s the other way around. Any young that are allowed freedom to grow from inside, are kind, co-operative, fun loving, and compassionate.

It’s the ones forced into obedience that we need to watch out for. They are full of trouble. When we see misbehaving kids, it’s not because they have been without discipline, it’s because they have been ordered around unfairly, and without respect. They hurt, and the feelings guiding them, are not good ones.

People have lost awareness of what a child is willing to do when they are granted their own life. It is a real eye opener. They look at us for what we want from them, and they ask. They would die for us. All this really happens!

The need for obedience is all about the comfort of the caregivers, it’s not because it works. It doesn’t work.

To sum things up, obedience and control exist only because those in control like it that way. It serves no useful purpose. Tragically, it destroys everybody’s lives, including the caregivers.

Try it out! Back off on the control. Cooperation, along with trust happens every time, after an adjustment period.

Once we take away control, all conflict ends. What is there left to fight about? Who gets the last piece of pie? That fight never happens. It’s more like you have it, no, no, you have it.

Removing control is the way back to how life is supposed to be. Belief in control is what brought this much hate into society.

This is where mankind went wrong.

How could we mess up so badly, and not realize we are doing it? That’s another story. It’s about the damage we have to cause, before it becomes possible for another person to become obedient. It’s about repression, and being unable to appreciate what we can’t feel. It’s about hurting so bad, we have become “hurt blind”. Hurt blind will keep coming up, because it’s the reason we can’t see people being hurt, and people acting out of hurt.

This “hurt blind” dynamic is covered more thoroughly in some of the other posts.

This blog is clarity-of-innocence.com.

There are many related posts, all exploring varies aspects of this same, absolutely consistent issue.

Thank you for allowing me to be part of your day!

Norm Cormier.