Clarity of Innocence

Our environment is not a healthy one for the young. Just about every one of us adults has issues, and this is where it all starts.

Unwelcome change happen to each of us, before we ever get through childhood.

Each of us may have work to do, but that doesn’t mean we ever did anything wrong.

Our issues came from outside ourselves. They came from our environment. They came from others.

It’s nobody’s fault. Our civilization is unaware of the real needs of life.

One by one, we unintentionally damage our children.

After we have been through early childhood trauma, what remains of our inner world has no memory of what we did to relieve our hurt, making it difficult, or impossible to recover.

In this condition, we no longer believe in the absolute purity of our real identity.

Most things that we try, are going to make things worse. It doesn’t help that we invariably believe it’s our own fault. We believe we caused our own trauma, through our own failure.

It never was us, that messed up though. We were presented with unbearable hurt, and an impossible choice!

The choice that we made, which allowed our survival, also caused us to forget what we did, because while disconnecting eases our hurt, it also removes access to some memory.

Our lives should spring from inside. Every living thing does that.

Feelings, wishes, needs, fears, wishes, and loves, this all comes from deep within.

In all of nature we see all life fully supported in their efforts at survival, by mother nature. That’s how it’s supposed to work.

Every life feels powerful. Every life feels good.

Now, a question.

This is for all of us.

In our early years, did we ever feel supported in anything we were trying to do, while trying on our own, out of our own internal wishes and needs?

Remember, all other life on the planet feels full natural support for all their efforts. That’s the default condition for life.

An honest answer is going to be either no, or maybe sometimes.

That’s where each of our lives went wrong.

The approval we need to exist as ourselves, was never there!

We were allowed to exist only as others allowed. They chose those qualities arbitrarily, according to their beliefs.

Who we really were was the result of nature’s trial and error system of making life as competent and efficient as possible.

We were already the best of the best.

None of the bad habits of the present generation of mankind existed within us yet.

We can only ever be who we really are. Who we are is set at conception, and that’s it! We can’t successfully ever be anything else.

To accommodate the wishes of others, there is only one change we can make. We can hide things. We can hide those qualities others don’t like!

We cannot be who people want, but we can hide everything that demonstrates that we aren’t that person.

Starting to appear somewhat unhealthy already, isn’t it!

Unfortunately, when we do that imitation, our feelings hurt. Serious, life threatening hurt.

Time and nature have refined our identity to survive at all costs. We break connection with our own identity and feelings. We have to defy these, to be as others wish!

Then we hurt.

This shouldn’t happen. It doesn’t with all other life.

The consequences take us to conflict, loneliness, chaos, war, power seeking, and genocide.

Life has a natural right to be itself.

Mankind has yet to learn that lesson. It better happen soon!

There is no such thing as a real “bad” thought. We may have thoughts, that we have come to believe are bad, but only because someone convinced us of it.

Encouraged on our own, and with full connection to our feelings, people are great. In our natural condition, we are without a doubt the kindest, most empathetic, thoughtful, and playful creatures on the planet.

Why then all this planet wide conflict? Why do so many feel like their feelings are inappropriate, and just bad?

Because we are easily damaged. Most, if not all of us are already damaged.

Life comes from inside. What happens when we don’t let it?

We hurt! To behave as others want us to, it becomes necessary to defeat our own identity.

Our identity is supposed to drive the bus. It will never give up. That’s death to it! It’s who we are. It’s death to us.

Our identity talks to us through feelings. Our feelings hurt when our identity is ignored in favor of obedience. It’s not a little hurt, it’s life and death hurt. No other life insists on that degree of control over their young.

We were meant to be who we are. That’s the best person we can ever be. It’s also the only thing we can ever be. We are already the best of the best.

When we accept the instructions of others, roll over, and defy the driving force of our identity, acting as requested, we hurt in a way that nobody can live with.

We become forced to pull away from our own painful feelings.

At this point, and with the pressure from others to behave as they see fit, it is easy and safer to regard our own natural wishes, as wrong.

Our identity and feelings can no longer defend the purity of our real inner life. They have lost their power.

With that damage, we can now see our real selves as wrong. Now, and not until now, could we ever regard our real selves as “bad”.

We aren’t bad. We never were!

We are damaged though. In this damaged condition we might want to do things we know aren’t right. It’s necessary to be careful.

This a difficult position to be in, and it’s easy to view ourselves as bad. We aren’t bad. We are only damaged. It can be reversed.

How?

Well, our damage was to abandon everything about ourselves that hurt too much to carry on!

We discarded everything in our inner life that we couldn’t live with!

Our only other choice was to die, and some do!

How do we get back? Can we ever feel perfect again?

We re-integrate! We reclaim everything about ourselves that we pushed out of our lives!

We own those bad feelings and wishes. That will take us back. It hurts though.

They feel horrible. We have been avoiding these feelings. We are ashamed of them. We learned to be. That makes things worse.

As we accept and reintegrate, we regain more and more of our own reality. Our vitality returns, step by step.

We no longer feel “bad” lurking anywhere in our existence. We feel only good.

How did we get here? With the early feeling damage, adults have tended to do what makes them feel better, rather than what works best.

What works best is to allow the young to develop and thrive through their own values and efforts.

What people do instead though, is control everything. That feels really good to a person, with hurt inside.

Anybody going down that road gets rapidly increasing conflict, and eventually, violence. Our entire race is in trouble that way.

The answer once again? Own it. Own it all. Accept the hurt. It’s temporary. It’s the road back to being completely, and wonderfully, ourselves.

It’s getting our our feelings back, and consequently, connection with our identity!

Good luck on your journey.

This blog is clarity-of-innocence.com There are lots of related posts.

Thank you for allowing me into your life!

Norm.