Contrary to our normal beliefs, how comfortable we feel expressing everything that we can is what determines how brave we will feel.
What limits our expression?
We do!
Every time we control the actions of another person, we limit it more.
Controlling others puts us in fear!
Backing off brings us back out.
For every one of us, the road out of our own fear is to let go of trying to control anybody else!
There was a time when we didn’t do that.
As we ramped up our belief that we needed to be controlling the behavior of other people, our conflict rose with it. That reinforced our belief that others needed our guidance, leading to increased control.
Which, of course, caused more conflict!
Here we are now, at the brink of destroying ourselves, and our solution to every problem is to ramp up our control of others.
Few of us are about to admit it, but we live in fear now!
A new, but very old way!
Here is something we can try for ourselves. We reduce the amount we try to control the behavior of others.
No, the world won’t fall apart! The behavior of others will improve after they learn to trust the change.
But, our fear will begin to bleed off! Our expression will expand! Eventually, we will have no fear of speaking up in a crowd!
We can talk about anything without anxiety!
Our own society and beliefs have put each of us in our own box!
What keeps us there? Our own control of others!
WHY?
We are all born fearless. We have only instinctive fear which keeps us safe.
We have an inner world. We are in intimate connection with our needs, instincts, feelings, and most exciting of all, our power!
These connections keep us moral and sustainable. Anybody still connected in this way is a good person.
The beliefs of our society have gradually drifted into being highly destructive. One glimpse of the news should confirm that!
These beliefs are of control. Consequently, we are going to be controlled.
Our reaction? Hurt, then rebellion. We criticize. We defend ourselves with an attack on others.
In this way we have isolated ourselves. Honest expression becomes reduced on all sides. We conceal our feelings! So do others!
As we all proceed down this road together, our impression of what is normal changes.
At this point, real life to us sounds like science fiction. We have lost all understanding of what real life is like!
We now consider control of everything and everybody to be normal and necessary. Well, it isn’t! It’s destructive!
None of us can feel our needs or feelings anymore, and the assistance of our instincts is gone as well.
None of us feel powerful, as we did when we began life. We all know something is lost. We can feel that!
REAL LIFE
Sadly, it’s the absence of control over others that works best, and we don’t know it!
People trust, cooperate, and feel good. Our well connected inner life makes sure of that!
Control over others doesn’t work. It leads straight into isolation, conflict, and hate! There is no turning around. There becomes evermore reason for more control as everything inevitably comes apart!
Mankind’s only hope is to escape from the road to tyranny.
It is no mistake that From Robin Hood to Star Wars, all our best stories concern the fight against tyranny. Tyranny is the eventual result of any control at all!
Life doesn’t need control! It’s designed to find it’s own way. It’s always at it’s best unguided!
Most of us will not make the escape. The loss of connection to our inner life prevents the imagination necessary to see things in any other way but through societies beliefs.
Some of us can and will though. Living with the understanding of the dangers of control causes further understanding to keep happening spontaneously!
Thanks for listening.
Good luck on your own journey.
This post is part of https://clarity-of-innocence.com
Take care,
Norm Cormier
I welcome considering other thoughts.