This is not about looks. It never has been.
It’s about the glow of a healthy life.
Every happy person looks great and is normally well-liked.
It’s about being happy.
It’s about feeling good. If we can accomplish that, we will indeed look great and be liked.
That, though, can only come from the inside.
If we can achieve that, we will be different. Our goals will be more about good relationships and less about being important.
Why?
When living from within, we naturally feel as important as we can ever get. That happens all by itself.
Being attractive is all about living from the energy within and expressing what comes from within.
Infants clearly demonstrate that attractiveness.
INFANTS
Infants look lovely. They are interesting to us as well, if we can still relate to feelings and spontaneity.
We can bond with them effortlessly. They are a joy to be around. They bring life to the party.
If only we could keep those qualities!
Well, we can.
For most of us, however, it’s more a question of getting back to our original condition than staying that way. We have already lost the ability to live from our own identity.
WHAT HAPPENS TO US?
We become stuck in one attitude. We become boring. Our bodies express our feelings. Our feelings have become desperation and determination.
What has happened to us?
THE POWER WITHIN
All life is powered from within.
It arrives in its finished condition.
It doesn’t require guidance. What it really needs is support and encouragement.
Any of us who received support and encouragement instead of instruction and guidance still appear attractive and interesting.
That’s the difference. Being interesting and attractive comes from a supportive childhood. It comes from being truly happy.
Everything good in people comes from deep inside.
Everything spontaneous and fun does too.
The secret is to live from the power and energy within! The luckiest of us got to do that.
LIVING FROM THE POWER WITHIN
Most of us can’t do it anymore. It’s not our fault.
All life supports and encourages their offspring to develop their own strength, get out there, and find their own way.
Except people. People, sadly, have decided to try a different way.
It was not a wise experiment!
Wisdom comes from within. It comes from instincts, feelings, and needs.
Mankind has lost its wisdom.
Dominating the lives of our young didn’t come from instincts or feelings. That impulse didn’t come from within us.
It came from peer pressure, on us and from us.
Any of us, away from the crowd, would resort to our instincts, supporting our children in their own efforts, as opposed to forcing them to obey our every whim.
Forced obedience is not nurture.
Nurture is support and encouragement.
Very few of us received only support and encouragement.
This is what has happened to our loving human environment. We crashed that when we took over completely.
Everything good comes from inside.
Everything stifling and spirit-crushing comes from peer pressure.
Our world has become a peer pressure world. Almost everything good in us is now absent.
CAN WE RECOVER FROM THIS LOSS OF LIVING FROM OUR POWER?
Yes, we can.
We can’t, however, feel our own way back.
Our feelings won’t return to us until we are well along on our path of recovery.
We have to take it on faith that living from our own inner resources is healthier for us than living somebody else’s pipe-dream.
This, of course, is what therapy tries to accomplish. We try to learn how to be ourselves again.
RECOVERY
Peer pressure has to go. It never worked.
It put us in our own private prison. It never helped us; not in any way.
Sure, it made us feel safer fitting in. But only our feelings experienced any relief. We would have been infinitely more successful in every way, living from our own energy.
Peer pressure is a trap. We become stuck. We have to be what others want us to be. It’s a lifetime sentence. We have to surrender everything good, honest, loving, and exciting about ourselves.
It amounts to a lost life!
Peer pressure has to go. We need to strike out on our own. We did it as a baby, and we can do it now. It may not feel like it right away, but the reemergence of our real lives is the eventual consequence. We get steadily stronger, not more helpless.
Life begins to regain its excitement and its purpose.
We experience a growing sense of who we are and what we really want.
THE NEXT STEP
Living according to the wishes of others will have had a crippling effect on our whole lives.
There will be a reservoir of behaviors and appearances that we will be ashamed of. This reservoir of shame will have come from other’s opinions. Peer-pressure.
Most, if not all, of these issues will be perfectly normal thoughts and behaviors for normal life.
Can you imagine any creature being ashamed of its own body? Well, most of us humans are. That came from peer pressure, not from our real nature.
Our real nature is infinitely wiser. Our real nature craves close relationships. That, all by itself, ensures a loving demeanor. All without shame.
Want to be gloriously happy? Reconnect with your own real nature.
There will be no mistakes. There is a long history of wisdom and ability stored in our instincts, feelings, and needs. It’s there to draw from. It’s our power.
We need to let go of our efforts to fit in and trust our gut instead. That will be the end of mistakes. We get happier, too. Now we can steer our own happiness!
THE BOTTOM LINE
The process of returning to and living from our inner resources takes time. Quite a bit of time. It’s a big effort, to say the least.
It’s the right direction, though. Step by step, we become happier and healthier.
More accepted by others for sure. That part is pure magic.
Our posture will change by itself. So will our energy.
Living from the thoughts and wishes of others is a trap and a prison.
Our entire demeanor shows our despair.
Living from our own inner resources is the magic cure. We radiate health. Life becomes good.
In this condition, our goals are never destructive.
Thanks for listening.
Good luck on your journey.
Take care,
Norm Cormier
I welcome considering other thoughts.